Robot Monster (1953)

Robot Monster (1953)

June 23, 2004

DVD, Somerville, MA

No Rating

By Scott Muoio

What can one say that hasn’t already been said regarding one of the most absurd movies in cinematic history? Like a piñata begging for a beating, I might as well get my swings in, too.

Robot Monster is a 1953 film directed by Phil Tucker. Upon its release, the movie was panned so vehemently by audiences and critics that Mr. Tucker unsuccessfully attempted suicide shortly after its debut. It’s a sad story, for sure, but one that becomes crystal clear to a modern audience with merely five minutes of viewing. Confused, dumbfounded, and surely a bit bored, these are the feelings anyone from 1953 to 2004 will undoubtedly feel when caught in the grips of the fearsome celluloid catastrophe, Robot Monster.

Originally filmed and exhibited in 3-D, Robot Monster has all the hallmarks of early 50’s sci-fi: gimmicks, strange monsters, bizarre pseudo-scientific philosophizing, stock footage, scantily clad (for the time) helpless women, and a male lead who takes his shirt off without reason (and then keeps it off for nearly half the movie). The story is likewise a ‘50s favorite: an alien race comes to earth, obliterates all but a few humans, and said remaining humans save the planet. Pretty typical stuff, really. But to judge a movie like Robot Monster as you might a current multi-million dollar extravaganza is unfair. Rather, Robot Monster wriggles around general criticism by succeeding in exactly what it was most assuredly intended to do: entertain.

As I sat in front of my television, jaw agape, watching a man in a monkey suit wearing a tin helmet with attached antennae speaking into a mirror to a “Great Guidance” on some distant planet, I was indeed in awe and entertained. Movies like this just don’t get made these days and it’s somewhat of a shame. Crude, dumb, and downright silly, Robot Monster radiates an innocence that is greatly missing in our cynical ironic times. Yes, it is dated. Yes, it is silly. Yes, it is implausible (well, that is, until the big climax, which, of course, I wouldn’t dare spoil here). But Robot Monster is also a helluva lot of fun and miraculously held my attention for its complete running time, an accomplishment most of today’s films fall far short of achieving.

Some final points to consider: where else will you see a giant bubble machine or a man in an ape suit passed off as a “moon man” or a young kid sticking his tongue out at the baddie (today it would certainly be a middle finger and a clichéd catch phrase) or spacey dialogue that takes itself seriously rather than “wink-wink, nudge-nudging” to an audience that is in on the joke? I’ll tell you where: nowhere. Wholeheartedly bad yet perversely entertaining, Robot Monster has survived to this day because it masters its ludicrous domain without the slightest hint of irony. And that’s a good thing.

Fifty years from its debut we still talk about Robot Monster. Will the same be said for 99% of the movies made in the 1990s fifty years from now? I don’t think so. And that, more than anything, is the greatest testament to this all-time celluloid oddity.